...I'm so glad I'm not in relationship with the God of Oprah W. and Tolle.
This author, Tolle, that Winfrey touts so highly claims that the experience of God is all about what you feel, rather than being about what you believe. Well, all I can say is I'm SOOO glad it is not that way between me and my God, especially on a day like today.
On a day like today, I can go to my God and say:
...even though I've had a headache that could kill a horse today...
...and even though a prayer partner needs intercession, but has to keep it in the dark for now, so I don't know quite how "serious" this need is...
...and even though home kids today seemed bent on playing "who can we make look the most stupid" with their friends...
...and even though school kids today decided to misbehave in a frustratingly bizarre way that they'd never conceived of doing before...
...and even though I have to take a little one to baseball practice tonight and will sit there for an hour in a camp chair when I'd rather be lying down with a cool compress on my head...
...and even though my donation to my school's fundraising auction was lost--or maybe stolen--in the mail...
...and even though there was a malaise, an almost subliminal unsettled discouragement and tiredness over almost every adult I met today...
...still...
the feelings generated by all these "and evens" don't spell the way of things between Thee and me. I can go on what I believe. So even as I holler at my youngest to find his ball glove, and I swat at the fighting cats and I sigh deeply, longing for even 30 minutes when the kids don't come up, breathing down my neck as I type, asking, "How much longer ya'gonna be?" Even as all that goes on, I can stop and breathe and remind myself of what I believe, no matter what feelings come and go...
Monday, April 21, 2008
Sunday, April 13, 2008
The days of fir trees and myrtle
I dreamed the bushes that wept frozen tears were razed to the ground. And it happened. But even before it did, I felt God whisper in my ear a reminder of this verse when I asked Him if this cutting I saw was death or pruning:
Isa 55:13
Instead of the thorn shall come up the fir tree, and instead of the brier shall come up the myrtle tree: and it shall be to the LORD for a name, for an everlasting sign [that] shall not be cut off.
Now it has all been accomplished, and I see many more of the images and prayers that have leapt between my Master and me are involved in this large living-out of things that was already "real" in that other place, in the "real-er" place in the place that this world has no choice but to somehow follow.
A year ago Easter, I mentioned my vision of facing Christ on the cross in that moment when He felt "forsaken." In the prayer dream, it was a sweet moment of being a type of the Church inspiring Him in his most desperate hour. But now I think of John's words in Revelation, when he said he ate a little book that was sweet in his mouth, but bitter in his belly. So, too, for me in the translation of this vision's taste in my mouth to its actual digesting into my life, for when this dream became manifest in the world of actualities, I began to understand that He could not look so lovely here. Who was I to think that when God thought Him unlovely, I could even yet see Him as lovely? And this was a thing of chastening, but did not change the question posed to me: would I stay at the Cross anyway, even as I had said I would do in the prayer-dream? My answer was, yes, because I did stay in the prayer dream until He said "It is finished."
I pondered on all the things I learned and noticed at the time of the vision: the fact that it aligned with the part of the Gospel of John wherein Jesus fulfills prophecy by saying He thirsts, and that they gave him a sponge to drink, and that we've "forgotten" the sponge that he actually received for the sake of an almost hypnotic focus on the first sponge that he rejected; also that these moments of the Cross-experience for the Lord drew up quotes from Psalm 22, and one of the lines in that Psalm has Him praying these words: Deliver my soul from the sword; my darling from the power of the dog, although we've changed the word "darling" to "my precious soul" so that he is praying for himself only in that line. But as for me, I'm deeply thankful that some Bibles will put the original wording in the footnotes, for revisiting this Psalm took my breath away as I had also previously dreamed of being chased by these "spiritual dogs" only to find refuge in a garden of my Lord under angelic guard.
All these things spoke volumes to me from the domain of God's Kingdom. But when "real life" visited these themes, they came with the appearance of sin come like flood invading every bit of groundwork in my life, and as a thief come to betray me even in my own home. But I stayed at that cross, until all evidence of its work was finished. I waited while nothing changed-with my suspicions neither justified nor condemned, my expectations of post-storm damage hanging in the unknown realm. So I asked God, what is this time about? And He said to me, "You are in the between-time, between the Cross and the Resurrection. Even as you have walked a personal experience with the Cross, so shall you see the Resurrection. Do not attempt to understand why things are what they are or how they are to be judged until the Resurrection is real for you, too." So I have been waiting these last few days for that Resurrection revelation.
Then one afternoon--in fact 21 days exactly from the day I first faced this Cross--as I drove home from work there came to me suddenly, as a fully formed idea, this thought: my sojourn at the Cross is actually better proven if all claims of innocence around me are accepted as trustworthy in the days where this vision proves itself a reality. If it be Christ's Cross I face, I should expect to look on sin worn as guilt, but not on an actual sinner. Everything locked into a brilliant focus with that realization. And it was like when Jesus said to Peter, Blessed art thou, Simon Barjona: for flesh and blood hath not revealed [it] unto thee, but my Father which is in heaven because it came to me in such an epiphany that my first thought was: Of course! How did I not see this before?
So I asked God the obvious question at the end of such a journey: why? I think of the verse He gave me, the one of the changed plants. Now that my brier is grown up a myrtle, what is the point of it? Am I being readied for something? And in answer, He reminded me of something that I prayed a year ago last July...a one-sentence prayer that I was revisiting with a shifted emphasis.
"Lord, break the power of sin over me." My first visit to this prayer held the obvious emphasis on the power of sin being removed from my life. But this later use of the breath-prayer was to focus on the last part, the "over me"part. It changed from being petitionary (Lord, break the power) to being intercessory (Lord, do it over me, let me be the flood wall that stops the breakers of sin in Your creation.) God's answer to this second layer of this little prayer's focus was the answer to the question of why and underpins the assurance that it will be for a sign forever...making it all especially fitting that it should be connected with images of the Cross and Resurrection.
Luk 1:37
For with God nothing shall be impossible.
Luk 1:38
And Mary said, Behold the handmaid of the Lord; be it unto me according to thy word. And the angel departed from her.
Isa 55:13
Instead of the thorn shall come up the fir tree, and instead of the brier shall come up the myrtle tree: and it shall be to the LORD for a name, for an everlasting sign [that] shall not be cut off.
Now it has all been accomplished, and I see many more of the images and prayers that have leapt between my Master and me are involved in this large living-out of things that was already "real" in that other place, in the "real-er" place in the place that this world has no choice but to somehow follow.
A year ago Easter, I mentioned my vision of facing Christ on the cross in that moment when He felt "forsaken." In the prayer dream, it was a sweet moment of being a type of the Church inspiring Him in his most desperate hour. But now I think of John's words in Revelation, when he said he ate a little book that was sweet in his mouth, but bitter in his belly. So, too, for me in the translation of this vision's taste in my mouth to its actual digesting into my life, for when this dream became manifest in the world of actualities, I began to understand that He could not look so lovely here. Who was I to think that when God thought Him unlovely, I could even yet see Him as lovely? And this was a thing of chastening, but did not change the question posed to me: would I stay at the Cross anyway, even as I had said I would do in the prayer-dream? My answer was, yes, because I did stay in the prayer dream until He said "It is finished."
I pondered on all the things I learned and noticed at the time of the vision: the fact that it aligned with the part of the Gospel of John wherein Jesus fulfills prophecy by saying He thirsts, and that they gave him a sponge to drink, and that we've "forgotten" the sponge that he actually received for the sake of an almost hypnotic focus on the first sponge that he rejected; also that these moments of the Cross-experience for the Lord drew up quotes from Psalm 22, and one of the lines in that Psalm has Him praying these words: Deliver my soul from the sword; my darling from the power of the dog, although we've changed the word "darling" to "my precious soul" so that he is praying for himself only in that line. But as for me, I'm deeply thankful that some Bibles will put the original wording in the footnotes, for revisiting this Psalm took my breath away as I had also previously dreamed of being chased by these "spiritual dogs" only to find refuge in a garden of my Lord under angelic guard.
All these things spoke volumes to me from the domain of God's Kingdom. But when "real life" visited these themes, they came with the appearance of sin come like flood invading every bit of groundwork in my life, and as a thief come to betray me even in my own home. But I stayed at that cross, until all evidence of its work was finished. I waited while nothing changed-with my suspicions neither justified nor condemned, my expectations of post-storm damage hanging in the unknown realm. So I asked God, what is this time about? And He said to me, "You are in the between-time, between the Cross and the Resurrection. Even as you have walked a personal experience with the Cross, so shall you see the Resurrection. Do not attempt to understand why things are what they are or how they are to be judged until the Resurrection is real for you, too." So I have been waiting these last few days for that Resurrection revelation.
Then one afternoon--in fact 21 days exactly from the day I first faced this Cross--as I drove home from work there came to me suddenly, as a fully formed idea, this thought: my sojourn at the Cross is actually better proven if all claims of innocence around me are accepted as trustworthy in the days where this vision proves itself a reality. If it be Christ's Cross I face, I should expect to look on sin worn as guilt, but not on an actual sinner. Everything locked into a brilliant focus with that realization. And it was like when Jesus said to Peter, Blessed art thou, Simon Barjona: for flesh and blood hath not revealed [it] unto thee, but my Father which is in heaven because it came to me in such an epiphany that my first thought was: Of course! How did I not see this before?
So I asked God the obvious question at the end of such a journey: why? I think of the verse He gave me, the one of the changed plants. Now that my brier is grown up a myrtle, what is the point of it? Am I being readied for something? And in answer, He reminded me of something that I prayed a year ago last July...a one-sentence prayer that I was revisiting with a shifted emphasis.
"Lord, break the power of sin over me." My first visit to this prayer held the obvious emphasis on the power of sin being removed from my life. But this later use of the breath-prayer was to focus on the last part, the "over me"part. It changed from being petitionary (Lord, break the power) to being intercessory (Lord, do it over me, let me be the flood wall that stops the breakers of sin in Your creation.) God's answer to this second layer of this little prayer's focus was the answer to the question of why and underpins the assurance that it will be for a sign forever...making it all especially fitting that it should be connected with images of the Cross and Resurrection.
Luk 1:37
For with God nothing shall be impossible.
Luk 1:38
And Mary said, Behold the handmaid of the Lord; be it unto me according to thy word. And the angel departed from her.
Saturday, April 05, 2008
Integrity and the dream of the footstools
...It is one of those watchwords that has kept presenting itself to me of late.
As I review old journal entries, ones from two summers ago in particular, I find I looked at this word then, too. I wrote an interesting thought down then: "This [integrity] is not something I've really considered as a trait God would show toward me, rather simply something I am supposed to show toward God. But what is integrity?" These were the words I wrote then.
Since then, life has brought me to realize that the integrity of God toward me has indeed been paraded through diverse trials, and I have been called to answer as to what I think of it all. Of late, the most profound thought I've had in this arena is this: that although I didn't really understand fully, I nevertheless am not to stand in the place of the Accuser. There is such a place preserved (for now anyway) before the throne of God, but I am not to stand in that place.
In fact, even as I type this, I remember a dream I had about a footstool. It was a beautiful little footstool, made of soft leather and standing on three fine, satin-smooth wooden legs. It felt good just to look upon it. But butted up against it was a big ottoman, of dingy micro fibre. It had the appearance of other things I've seen in dreams as being the furnishings of the synagogue of Satan. In this dream, I knew it was not good that these footstools should be so close, even touching, so I tried to pull the smaller and beautiful footstool away from the big ugly one. But I did not have the power to move the small one.
I've wondered for a long time what these footstools meant, and why I did what I did--or rather couldn't do what I couldn't do. But, it now seems to me that it is about this idea of removing o separating the authority of the Accuser that calls to the attention of God the guilt of others perpetually presenting this to God--separating this big ugly footstool from the one that is light and beautiful, balanced and simple and and unassuming in the fullness of its goodness. Generally, the one stool presents itself as if it were attached to the other, in other words authority marches at the prompting of Satan when he masquerades himself as one wrapped in the light of Integrity. It is not for me alone to have this task of removing such an Accuser from the presence of the Beautiful One...but I certainly stand near enough to see the true natures of these footstools of authority at the very foot of His throne. I have heard You say this so much lately, and I hear it again regarding this: more is yet to be revealed. For now, this much I know: that no matter what my eyes and life might show me, I will not only refrain from vengeance, I will refrain even from accusation, not joining myself to those who would put accusation in place of intercession, forgetting to wait upon You to work Your own will.
This command I will honor as long as You bring it to my mind, which I pray You do often, and I see even now Your ways of under girding it.
Now as I search this word, integrity, I find foundational wisdom in embracing integrity in this path of meekness--even though I feel rather alone as many would profess wisdom in the opposite: that by integrity we are to condemn the wicked. Such as these accusers might quote Psalm 18:25 to their support: "To the faithful You show Yourself faithful; to those with integrity You show integrity." And I know the many references in the epistles about shunning those who are not walking uprightly. I do not refute the wisdom of these scriptures, but I'd nevertheless point out as well that I Samuel 16:7 says "The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart." I believe that true integrity is grounded in hope in God's own integrity, and not in a focus that is put on the lack of integrity in men, leading to accusation. "I would have lost heart unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living," says Psalm 27:13. I can say a hearty amen to that verse.
And as for judging others based on the uprightness already proven within us, lest we forget, these words are also written:
Psalm 7:8:
The LORD shall judge the people: judge me, O LORD, according to my righteousness, and according to mine integrity [that is] in me.
Again,what is our purpose in considering integrity? Is it that we might be inspired to beg God Himself to be our harshest critic, to our good? Because he is both just and merciful and a searcher of the heart? So my ultimate prayer in this is not that I might use my integrity as a tool of attack, but of defense--for myself and for those for whom I'm called into intercession. So I pray this verse, too, as I know my family have had dreams of sliding:
Psalm 26:1:
[[[A Psalm] of David.]] Judge me, O LORD; for I have walked in mine integrity: I have trusted also in the LORD; [therefore] I shall not slide.
And for more evidence of this role of integrity as a shield of lovingkindness over us and not as a weapon formed against those He puts under our authority:
Psalm 78:72
So he fed them according to the integrity of his heart; and guided them by the skillfulness of his hands.
What's more, integrity is to be more like a wilderness guide than a ring to drive into the ear of one under us:
Proverbs 11:3 The integrity of the upright shall guide them: but the perverseness of transgressors shall destroy them.
So in the end, the question is this: is He our shield that we wield to the inspiration of others who are under us? Or, is our shield formed by our confidence in the righteousness of our accusations against others as we force them to choose: embrace our wisdom and goodness as evidence of your respect for the authority we've been given over you, or else be damned? As Oswald Chambers would say: are we using Christ's very weapons against Him?
So what says the final authority, our Lord Jesus about these things?
Mar 10:42
But Jesus called them [to him], and saith unto them, Ye know that they which are accounted to rule over the Gentiles exercise lordship over them; and their great ones exercise authority upon them.
Mar 10:43
But so shall it not be among you: but whosoever will be great among you, shall be your minister:
Mar 10:44
And whosoever of you will be the chiefest, shall be servant of all.
Mar 10:45
For even the Son of man came not to be ministered unto, but to minister, and to give his life a ransom for many.
These words from Christ, the only one who really has the authority to accuse and condemn.
But why is this so important? It manifests itself as a sign of the end of the age. Who but the Accuser will be put down finally and unequivocally in the day that Revelation 12 is finished:
Rev 12:10
And I heard a loud voice saying in heaven, Now is come salvation, and strength, and the kingdom of our God, and the power of his Christ: for the accuser of our brethren is cast down, which accused them before our God day and night.
Rev 12:11
And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony; and they loved not their lives unto the death.
(I know that many believe the events of this chapter in scripture are already accomplished, as Satan has been cast out of heaven, and Jesus said He saw Lucifer fall. But I believe Lucifer was cast out as a resident, and so these words of Rev. 12 are about something else. The Accuser is obviously still permitted access to God's throne room for this purpose of accusing; if it were not so, books like Job and Zechariah could not even exist and the word of our testimony and the blood of the Lamb would be put out of order. No...there is still much yet to be revealed, such as the nature of the day when this accuser loses more than just his residency, but loses even his very access entirely, the day when God walks us into the the covenant of perpetual peace.)
So we must decide: where do we stand when we enter the throne room of God? Alongside the one who accuses the brethren or alongside the one who says I come for those who need a physician? Both are in close proximity to each other for now.
And if all this is not enough to convince, humility begs a voice as well, for who is to say we aren't mistaken as we make our judgments regarding the integrity of others? Abraham "gave" Sarah to King Abimelech on the presumption that the king had no integrity and would kill him in order to have Sarah if he confessed that Sarah was already bound to him as his wife. So to preserve his own life, he lay a tricky statement--not an untruth, but not a fully transparent truth either--before this king: "She is my sister," he said, without adding, "...and my wife."
But the Lord nevertheless spoke to Abimelech:
Gen 20:3
But God came to Abimelech in a dream by night, and said to him, Behold, thou [art but] a dead man, for the woman which thou hast taken; for she [is] a man's wife.
Gen 20:4
But Abimelech had not come near her: and he said, Lord, wilt thou slay also a righteous nation?
Gen 20:5
Said he not unto me, She [is] my sister? and she, even she herself said, He [is] my brother: in the integrity of my heart and innocency of my hands have I done this.
Gen 20:6
And God said unto him in a dream, Yea, I know that thou didst this in the integrity of thy heart; for I also withheld thee from sinning against me: therefore suffered I thee not to touch her.
Gen 20:7
Now therefore restore the man [his] wife; for he [is] a prophet, and he shall pray for thee, and thou shalt live: and if thou restore [her] not, know thou that thou shalt surely die, thou, and all that [are] thine.
Gen 20:10
And Abimelech said unto Abraham, What sawest thou, that thou hast done this thing?
And what was Abraham's answer as to why he walked this slippery path:
Gen 20:11
And Abraham said, Because I thought, Surely the fear of God [is] not in this place; and they will slay me for my wife's sake.
But we are so much more discerning of matters such as when to be suspect of the integrity of the ungodly, are we not, more so than was the "friend of God" called Abraham? And do we not see that God redeemed all, and made the confusing integrity straight, neither removing the prophetic gift of Abraham nor the fruits of integrity in the King. Would we be as wise as God in such a moment as this? In the end, these men made a strong covenant with each other before the Lord. Would all my judgments lead to such an end?
No, my word is only reliable in what I beg of Thee for myself, and as for me, I will consider my own integrity and will keep it separate from issues of authority and rule. These are too lofty for me. This is my hope and the grounding of my own covenant with my Redeemer, and it is a large one:
Pro 20:7
The just [man] walketh in his integrity: his children [are] blessed after him.
As I review old journal entries, ones from two summers ago in particular, I find I looked at this word then, too. I wrote an interesting thought down then: "This [integrity] is not something I've really considered as a trait God would show toward me, rather simply something I am supposed to show toward God. But what is integrity?" These were the words I wrote then.
Since then, life has brought me to realize that the integrity of God toward me has indeed been paraded through diverse trials, and I have been called to answer as to what I think of it all. Of late, the most profound thought I've had in this arena is this: that although I didn't really understand fully, I nevertheless am not to stand in the place of the Accuser. There is such a place preserved (for now anyway) before the throne of God, but I am not to stand in that place.
In fact, even as I type this, I remember a dream I had about a footstool. It was a beautiful little footstool, made of soft leather and standing on three fine, satin-smooth wooden legs. It felt good just to look upon it. But butted up against it was a big ottoman, of dingy micro fibre. It had the appearance of other things I've seen in dreams as being the furnishings of the synagogue of Satan. In this dream, I knew it was not good that these footstools should be so close, even touching, so I tried to pull the smaller and beautiful footstool away from the big ugly one. But I did not have the power to move the small one.
I've wondered for a long time what these footstools meant, and why I did what I did--or rather couldn't do what I couldn't do. But, it now seems to me that it is about this idea of removing o separating the authority of the Accuser that calls to the attention of God the guilt of others perpetually presenting this to God--separating this big ugly footstool from the one that is light and beautiful, balanced and simple and and unassuming in the fullness of its goodness. Generally, the one stool presents itself as if it were attached to the other, in other words authority marches at the prompting of Satan when he masquerades himself as one wrapped in the light of Integrity. It is not for me alone to have this task of removing such an Accuser from the presence of the Beautiful One...but I certainly stand near enough to see the true natures of these footstools of authority at the very foot of His throne. I have heard You say this so much lately, and I hear it again regarding this: more is yet to be revealed. For now, this much I know: that no matter what my eyes and life might show me, I will not only refrain from vengeance, I will refrain even from accusation, not joining myself to those who would put accusation in place of intercession, forgetting to wait upon You to work Your own will.
This command I will honor as long as You bring it to my mind, which I pray You do often, and I see even now Your ways of under girding it.
Now as I search this word, integrity, I find foundational wisdom in embracing integrity in this path of meekness--even though I feel rather alone as many would profess wisdom in the opposite: that by integrity we are to condemn the wicked. Such as these accusers might quote Psalm 18:25 to their support: "To the faithful You show Yourself faithful; to those with integrity You show integrity." And I know the many references in the epistles about shunning those who are not walking uprightly. I do not refute the wisdom of these scriptures, but I'd nevertheless point out as well that I Samuel 16:7 says "The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart." I believe that true integrity is grounded in hope in God's own integrity, and not in a focus that is put on the lack of integrity in men, leading to accusation. "I would have lost heart unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living," says Psalm 27:13. I can say a hearty amen to that verse.
And as for judging others based on the uprightness already proven within us, lest we forget, these words are also written:
Psalm 7:8:
The LORD shall judge the people: judge me, O LORD, according to my righteousness, and according to mine integrity [that is] in me.
Again,what is our purpose in considering integrity? Is it that we might be inspired to beg God Himself to be our harshest critic, to our good? Because he is both just and merciful and a searcher of the heart? So my ultimate prayer in this is not that I might use my integrity as a tool of attack, but of defense--for myself and for those for whom I'm called into intercession. So I pray this verse, too, as I know my family have had dreams of sliding:
Psalm 26:1:
[[[A Psalm] of David.]] Judge me, O LORD; for I have walked in mine integrity: I have trusted also in the LORD; [therefore] I shall not slide.
And for more evidence of this role of integrity as a shield of lovingkindness over us and not as a weapon formed against those He puts under our authority:
Psalm 78:72
So he fed them according to the integrity of his heart; and guided them by the skillfulness of his hands.
What's more, integrity is to be more like a wilderness guide than a ring to drive into the ear of one under us:
Proverbs 11:3 The integrity of the upright shall guide them: but the perverseness of transgressors shall destroy them.
So in the end, the question is this: is He our shield that we wield to the inspiration of others who are under us? Or, is our shield formed by our confidence in the righteousness of our accusations against others as we force them to choose: embrace our wisdom and goodness as evidence of your respect for the authority we've been given over you, or else be damned? As Oswald Chambers would say: are we using Christ's very weapons against Him?
So what says the final authority, our Lord Jesus about these things?
Mar 10:42
But Jesus called them [to him], and saith unto them, Ye know that they which are accounted to rule over the Gentiles exercise lordship over them; and their great ones exercise authority upon them.
Mar 10:43
But so shall it not be among you: but whosoever will be great among you, shall be your minister:
Mar 10:44
And whosoever of you will be the chiefest, shall be servant of all.
Mar 10:45
For even the Son of man came not to be ministered unto, but to minister, and to give his life a ransom for many.
These words from Christ, the only one who really has the authority to accuse and condemn.
But why is this so important? It manifests itself as a sign of the end of the age. Who but the Accuser will be put down finally and unequivocally in the day that Revelation 12 is finished:
Rev 12:10
And I heard a loud voice saying in heaven, Now is come salvation, and strength, and the kingdom of our God, and the power of his Christ: for the accuser of our brethren is cast down, which accused them before our God day and night.
Rev 12:11
And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony; and they loved not their lives unto the death.
(I know that many believe the events of this chapter in scripture are already accomplished, as Satan has been cast out of heaven, and Jesus said He saw Lucifer fall. But I believe Lucifer was cast out as a resident, and so these words of Rev. 12 are about something else. The Accuser is obviously still permitted access to God's throne room for this purpose of accusing; if it were not so, books like Job and Zechariah could not even exist and the word of our testimony and the blood of the Lamb would be put out of order. No...there is still much yet to be revealed, such as the nature of the day when this accuser loses more than just his residency, but loses even his very access entirely, the day when God walks us into the the covenant of perpetual peace.)
So we must decide: where do we stand when we enter the throne room of God? Alongside the one who accuses the brethren or alongside the one who says I come for those who need a physician? Both are in close proximity to each other for now.
And if all this is not enough to convince, humility begs a voice as well, for who is to say we aren't mistaken as we make our judgments regarding the integrity of others? Abraham "gave" Sarah to King Abimelech on the presumption that the king had no integrity and would kill him in order to have Sarah if he confessed that Sarah was already bound to him as his wife. So to preserve his own life, he lay a tricky statement--not an untruth, but not a fully transparent truth either--before this king: "She is my sister," he said, without adding, "...and my wife."
But the Lord nevertheless spoke to Abimelech:
Gen 20:3
But God came to Abimelech in a dream by night, and said to him, Behold, thou [art but] a dead man, for the woman which thou hast taken; for she [is] a man's wife.
Gen 20:4
But Abimelech had not come near her: and he said, Lord, wilt thou slay also a righteous nation?
Gen 20:5
Said he not unto me, She [is] my sister? and she, even she herself said, He [is] my brother: in the integrity of my heart and innocency of my hands have I done this.
Gen 20:6
And God said unto him in a dream, Yea, I know that thou didst this in the integrity of thy heart; for I also withheld thee from sinning against me: therefore suffered I thee not to touch her.
Gen 20:7
Now therefore restore the man [his] wife; for he [is] a prophet, and he shall pray for thee, and thou shalt live: and if thou restore [her] not, know thou that thou shalt surely die, thou, and all that [are] thine.
Gen 20:10
And Abimelech said unto Abraham, What sawest thou, that thou hast done this thing?
And what was Abraham's answer as to why he walked this slippery path:
Gen 20:11
And Abraham said, Because I thought, Surely the fear of God [is] not in this place; and they will slay me for my wife's sake.
But we are so much more discerning of matters such as when to be suspect of the integrity of the ungodly, are we not, more so than was the "friend of God" called Abraham? And do we not see that God redeemed all, and made the confusing integrity straight, neither removing the prophetic gift of Abraham nor the fruits of integrity in the King. Would we be as wise as God in such a moment as this? In the end, these men made a strong covenant with each other before the Lord. Would all my judgments lead to such an end?
No, my word is only reliable in what I beg of Thee for myself, and as for me, I will consider my own integrity and will keep it separate from issues of authority and rule. These are too lofty for me. This is my hope and the grounding of my own covenant with my Redeemer, and it is a large one:
Pro 20:7
The just [man] walketh in his integrity: his children [are] blessed after him.
Wednesday, April 02, 2008
An Afterword to All This, nd not my own...
Quotes from a book by Ken Gire called The Divine Embrace:
on the idea of how God speaks to each of us individually, as given metaphorically by the written Hebrew word:
The language of the OT is somewhat elusive because it was originally written only with consonants. The vowels, which were easily deduced by Hebrew readers, were omitted from the text. It wasn't until around A.D. 1000 that a group of Jewish scholars, known as the Masoretes, added vowels to the OT text. Even today, in most written Hebrew, such as a contemporary Jerusalem newspaper, the vowels are absent...
'Like the Hebrew alphabet,' Buechner writes, 'the alphabet of grace has no vowels, and in that sense his words to us are always veiled, subtle, cryptic, so that it is left to ourselves to delve their meaning, to fill in the vowels for ourselves by means of all the faith and imagination we can muster. God speaks to us in such a way, presumably, not because he chooses to be obscure but because, unlike a dictionary word whose meaning is fixed, the meaning of an incarnate word is the meaning it has for the one it is spoken to, the meaning that becomes clear and effective in our lives only when we ferret it out for ourselves.' " (pp.105-106)
on the ministry of Schweitzer, and how he dealt with the church in authority over his work condemning his doctrine:
"He went to Africa under the auspices of the conservative Missionary Society of Paris, but because of his theological views he agreed not to preach there but only to practice medicine. Years later, he told journalist Norman Cousins: 'I decided to make my life my argument. I would advocate the things I believed in terms of the life I lived and what I did.' (pp.154-155)
on the motivations that drive the likes of Pharisees and followers of Messiah:
"When our territory is threatened, a self-protective instinct rushes to suppress the threat. In the natural world, our competitive nature has helped us to survive. In the spiritual world, though, mere survival--whether it is the survival of a relationship or a business or a ministry or even of our physical existence--isn't the highest of heavenly concerns...John [the Baptist] knew he had been called to a dance, not a dance competition. "He must increase but I must decrease." John was so in tune with the divine orchestrations of events that he knew his place on the dance floor as well as the steps to the dance that God had ordained for him. And not one of those steps was a competitive one or even a self-protective one." (pp. 171-172)
on looking at the spiritual "last stand" of the martyr Ignatius:
"If Ignatius teaches us anything, it is this: The fear of criticism is silenced by falling in love. If we fall in love with Jesus, not only will nothing on this earth attract us, nothing on this earth will intimidate us." (p.177)
on the burdens unwelcome in the church of today, as quoted from Buechner's Whistling in the Dark:
Alcoholics Anonymous or A.A. is the name of a group of men and women who acknowledge that addiction to alcohol is ruining their lives. Their purpose in coming together is to give it up and help others do the same. They realize they can't pull this off by themselves. They believe they need each other, and they believe they need God. The ones who aren't so sure about God speak instead of their Higher Power...
Nobody lectures them, and they do not lecture each other. They simply tell their own stories with the candor that anonymity makes possible. They tell where they went wrong and how day by day they are trying to go right. They tell where they find the strength and understanding and hope to keep trying. Sometimes one of them will take special responsibility for another--to be available at any hour of the day or night if the need arises. There's not much more to it than that, and it seems to be enough. Healings happen. Miracles are made.
You can't help thinking that something like this is what the Church is meant to be and maybe once was before it got to be Big Business. Sinners Anonymous. 'I can will what is write but I cannot do it,' is the was Saint Paul put it, speaking for all of us. 'For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I do' (Romans 7:18-19 RSV)...No matter what far place alcoholics end up in, either in this country or virtually anywhere else, they know that there will be an A.A. meeting nearby to go to and that at that meeting they will find strangers who are not strangers to help and to heal, to listen to the truth and to tell it. That is what the Body of Christ is all about.
Would it ever occur to Christians in a far place to turn to a Church nearby in hope of finding the same? Would they find it? If not, you wonder what is so Big about the Church's Business." (pp. 186-187)
...and on the why of this seemingly inevitable mutation that strikes almost every God-movement collectively claimed and named by men--why do they forget what drove their first love, the deep-knowing that Jesus came not for the healthy but for those needing a physician? In a word: perfectionism. A quote from Anne Lamott's Bird by Bird.
I think perfectionism is based on the obsessive belief that if you run carefully enough, hitting each steppingstone just right, you won't have to die. The truth is that you will die anyway and that a lot of people who aren't even looking at their feet are going to do a whole lot better than you, and have a lot more fun while they're doing it. (p.180)
...so in light of all this, how do we pray? Gire closes the book with this reader's prayer:
Thank You, Lord Jesus,
Thank you for calling my name, extending your hand and inviting me
not only to be with you but to partner with you
in the work you are doing in the world.
How honored I feel that you not only want to dine with me
but also to dance with me.
Take my hand and draw me into the divine embrace.
In that embrace, help me to see myself not through my own eyes
but through yours.
Help me not to worry about my feet or wonder about the steps ahead
but merely to feel the music, fall into your arms, and follow your lead.
Thank you for all the places you are wanting to take me,
for all the things you are wanting to show me there and to tell me there.
I love the way you love me.
Strong and wild. Slow and easy. Heart and soul. So completely.
I love the feel of your name on my lips.
Jesus.
I is a beautiful name. No, it is the most beautiful name.
For all the longings I have for you, and for everything that stirs those longings,
I thank you.
I do love you so much. I long to love you even more.
Even more.
Help me to love you the way you deserve to be loved,
the way your Father loves you.
Like you are to him, I pray that you would be the delight of my life.
I pray that you would become my deepest hunger and my most satisfying food,
my most intense thirst and my most refreshing drink.
I know that if I just catch the slightest glimpse of your face
or hear the most distant echo of your voice that I will love you more.
So I ask for eyes to see all that in some way reflects you and ears to hear
all that in someway speaks of you.
I pray I could love you more each day than I did the day before
until, at last, metaphor becomes reality,
when I will see you face-to-face,
fall into your arms,
and dance!
on the idea of how God speaks to each of us individually, as given metaphorically by the written Hebrew word:
The language of the OT is somewhat elusive because it was originally written only with consonants. The vowels, which were easily deduced by Hebrew readers, were omitted from the text. It wasn't until around A.D. 1000 that a group of Jewish scholars, known as the Masoretes, added vowels to the OT text. Even today, in most written Hebrew, such as a contemporary Jerusalem newspaper, the vowels are absent...
'Like the Hebrew alphabet,' Buechner writes, 'the alphabet of grace has no vowels, and in that sense his words to us are always veiled, subtle, cryptic, so that it is left to ourselves to delve their meaning, to fill in the vowels for ourselves by means of all the faith and imagination we can muster. God speaks to us in such a way, presumably, not because he chooses to be obscure but because, unlike a dictionary word whose meaning is fixed, the meaning of an incarnate word is the meaning it has for the one it is spoken to, the meaning that becomes clear and effective in our lives only when we ferret it out for ourselves.' " (pp.105-106)
on the ministry of Schweitzer, and how he dealt with the church in authority over his work condemning his doctrine:
"He went to Africa under the auspices of the conservative Missionary Society of Paris, but because of his theological views he agreed not to preach there but only to practice medicine. Years later, he told journalist Norman Cousins: 'I decided to make my life my argument. I would advocate the things I believed in terms of the life I lived and what I did.' (pp.154-155)
on the motivations that drive the likes of Pharisees and followers of Messiah:
"When our territory is threatened, a self-protective instinct rushes to suppress the threat. In the natural world, our competitive nature has helped us to survive. In the spiritual world, though, mere survival--whether it is the survival of a relationship or a business or a ministry or even of our physical existence--isn't the highest of heavenly concerns...John [the Baptist] knew he had been called to a dance, not a dance competition. "He must increase but I must decrease." John was so in tune with the divine orchestrations of events that he knew his place on the dance floor as well as the steps to the dance that God had ordained for him. And not one of those steps was a competitive one or even a self-protective one." (pp. 171-172)
on looking at the spiritual "last stand" of the martyr Ignatius:
"If Ignatius teaches us anything, it is this: The fear of criticism is silenced by falling in love. If we fall in love with Jesus, not only will nothing on this earth attract us, nothing on this earth will intimidate us." (p.177)
on the burdens unwelcome in the church of today, as quoted from Buechner's Whistling in the Dark:
Alcoholics Anonymous or A.A. is the name of a group of men and women who acknowledge that addiction to alcohol is ruining their lives. Their purpose in coming together is to give it up and help others do the same. They realize they can't pull this off by themselves. They believe they need each other, and they believe they need God. The ones who aren't so sure about God speak instead of their Higher Power...
Nobody lectures them, and they do not lecture each other. They simply tell their own stories with the candor that anonymity makes possible. They tell where they went wrong and how day by day they are trying to go right. They tell where they find the strength and understanding and hope to keep trying. Sometimes one of them will take special responsibility for another--to be available at any hour of the day or night if the need arises. There's not much more to it than that, and it seems to be enough. Healings happen. Miracles are made.
You can't help thinking that something like this is what the Church is meant to be and maybe once was before it got to be Big Business. Sinners Anonymous. 'I can will what is write but I cannot do it,' is the was Saint Paul put it, speaking for all of us. 'For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I do' (Romans 7:18-19 RSV)...No matter what far place alcoholics end up in, either in this country or virtually anywhere else, they know that there will be an A.A. meeting nearby to go to and that at that meeting they will find strangers who are not strangers to help and to heal, to listen to the truth and to tell it. That is what the Body of Christ is all about.
Would it ever occur to Christians in a far place to turn to a Church nearby in hope of finding the same? Would they find it? If not, you wonder what is so Big about the Church's Business." (pp. 186-187)
...and on the why of this seemingly inevitable mutation that strikes almost every God-movement collectively claimed and named by men--why do they forget what drove their first love, the deep-knowing that Jesus came not for the healthy but for those needing a physician? In a word: perfectionism. A quote from Anne Lamott's Bird by Bird.
I think perfectionism is based on the obsessive belief that if you run carefully enough, hitting each steppingstone just right, you won't have to die. The truth is that you will die anyway and that a lot of people who aren't even looking at their feet are going to do a whole lot better than you, and have a lot more fun while they're doing it. (p.180)
...so in light of all this, how do we pray? Gire closes the book with this reader's prayer:
Thank You, Lord Jesus,
Thank you for calling my name, extending your hand and inviting me
not only to be with you but to partner with you
in the work you are doing in the world.
How honored I feel that you not only want to dine with me
but also to dance with me.
Take my hand and draw me into the divine embrace.
In that embrace, help me to see myself not through my own eyes
but through yours.
Help me not to worry about my feet or wonder about the steps ahead
but merely to feel the music, fall into your arms, and follow your lead.
Thank you for all the places you are wanting to take me,
for all the things you are wanting to show me there and to tell me there.
I love the way you love me.
Strong and wild. Slow and easy. Heart and soul. So completely.
I love the feel of your name on my lips.
Jesus.
I is a beautiful name. No, it is the most beautiful name.
For all the longings I have for you, and for everything that stirs those longings,
I thank you.
I do love you so much. I long to love you even more.
Even more.
Help me to love you the way you deserve to be loved,
the way your Father loves you.
Like you are to him, I pray that you would be the delight of my life.
I pray that you would become my deepest hunger and my most satisfying food,
my most intense thirst and my most refreshing drink.
I know that if I just catch the slightest glimpse of your face
or hear the most distant echo of your voice that I will love you more.
So I ask for eyes to see all that in some way reflects you and ears to hear
all that in someway speaks of you.
I pray I could love you more each day than I did the day before
until, at last, metaphor becomes reality,
when I will see you face-to-face,
fall into your arms,
and dance!
Tuesday, April 01, 2008
What do you call faith?
Something a fellow forum member posted in a thread I asked to revisit regarding the things I blogged yesterday. I was in great crisis yesterday as I faced the question under a naked and glaring bulb: how do I receive You, Lord Jesus? Then I saw what my forum-friend wrote, and I heard the sermon by Driscoll, and I began looking in the right direction.
I spent a lot of time recently looking at the claims of one website which denounced Eldredge, Miller, Bell, McLaren, and many others. While some of the claims against some authors, notably Tony Campolo, had some merit, many other claims were based on a very spurious point. It went something like this: Eldredge and others teach you to get alone and listen for God's speaking. Since the bible says we are to pray verbally, any advice to listen to God is New Age, and an open door to the enemy. Pretty ridiculous reasoning.
I wondered as I went to bed last night--are things, even down to the closest relationships in my life a lie, or are You the liar? It felt like this matter HAD to be decided as an either/or. This is the thrust of those who would erect a cross here. All or nothing. To say anything else is to be a heretic and in danger of hell-fire. And by the way, decide NOW! And behind it all, it seems that I'm actually facing that old Groucho Marx question: Who ya gonna believe, me or your lyin' eyes?" Only now, You're asking the question. Do I reject everything that has come to mean "relational interaction" between Thee and me as a thing evil? Do I return to a faith-on-paper life and cast in the fires of judgment all that You seem to say that is of a personal and guiding and loving nature--even those things I find confirmed in Your Word? I ask, because to throw away every text that has been black-listed by those You've placed in leadership over me throws this away, too.
Last night, in bed before I slept, I came through the crisis of whether my debate was all within my own heart; whether it ended there. Was I just a reactionary, mildly delusional woman who just needed and got a good dose of reality? Many would say yes. But even last night, I committed my will to the reality of Your presence in my life...Your real, Holy Spirit presence. And before I slept, I remembered two things You'd told me recently:
1) All has not yet been revealed...
2)The altar is accepted...
If an offering I am to make--and this You've shown me in that domain of Your Spirit where we commune--then there must be an altar. I am exploring every grain of wood upon it, O Ezekiel.
Now this morning, I go into Your word and find You confirm my faith pledge of my will to Thee. I read in Mark 6 and 8 the stories of the feeding of the 5000 and the 4000. After the feeding of the 5000, You went walking on the water before Your disciples, and they thought You a ghost and were terrified, and this after they'd almost let You walk right past them. Why? Their hearts were too hard to remember the miracle of the loaves.
Mar 6:46
And when he had sent them away, he departed into a mountain to pray.
Mar 6:47
And when even was come, the ship was in the midst of the sea, and he alone on the land.
Mar 6:48
And he saw them toiling in rowing; for the wind was contrary unto them: and about the fourth watch of the night he cometh unto them, walking upon the sea, and would have passed by them.
Mar 6:49
But when they saw him walking upon the sea, they supposed it had been a spirit, and cried out:
Mar 6:50
For they all saw him, and were troubled. And immediately he talked with them, and saith unto them, Be of good cheer: it is I; be not afraid.
Mar 6:51
And he went up unto them into the ship; and the wind ceased: and they were sore amazed in themselves beyond measure, and wondered.
Mar 6:52
For they considered not [the miracle] of the loaves: for their heart was hardened.
So later when You fed the 4000, and then You proceeded to be straight away asked yet again for a sign by the Pharisees, You sighed Your deepest of sighs over their demand, because You were "seeing" more than just what was before Your eyes...You were seeing the end of the age. And when You therefore told Your disciples to beware the leaven of the Pharisees and of Herod, here again they had the chance to get the point, but they didn't. They took Your words to be about whether they remembered bread for this boat trip that followed this feeding. They made the here and now simply that, and made Your instruction about their immediate existence and took it in the vein of condemnation. And You said:
Mar 8:17
And when Jesus knew [it], he saith unto them, Why reason ye, because ye have no bread? perceive ye not yet, neither understand? have ye your heart yet hardened?
Mar 8:18
Having eyes, see ye not? and having ears, hear ye not? and do ye not remember?
Mar 8:19
When I brake the five loaves among five thousand, how many baskets full of fragments took ye up? They say unto him, Twelve.
Mar 8:20
And when the seven among four thousand, how many baskets full of fragments took ye up? And they said, Seven.
Mar 8:21
And he said unto them, How is it that ye do not understand?
You taught them to look to the larger meaning of the events of the story of life that played before them and involved them, but was nevertheless a story bigger than they were. Consider things like the number of loaves, You said. And this is the same sort of thing You say to me.
Then You proceeded to heal a man in two stages, one who had obviously been able to see at one time for he know even in that half-way point inhis healing what a tree and what a man should look like. Did they understand why such a healing should "go there" in this Gospel telling?
And then, even Peter had to hear this from Jesus after Jesus had looked at all of them:
Get thee behind me, Satan: for thou savourest not the things that be of God, but the things that be of men. (8:33) Who hears that today? Even Peter?
So here was the question for me, as well. Would I walk with the Word in my hand, but continue to look at the events of life by limited vision? Or would I allow You to interpret them for me, in Your beautiful way? O God, may I never reason within myself condemnation over my lack of "real" bread when You are trying to give me hidden manna! I see now the machinations of Satan in these things that have tried my faith. It is like a bill before congress. To reject the bill is a wise thing, as much in the bill may indeed deny Your virgin birth, heaven, hell, etc. But, pork has been added to this bill...pork that should not be thrown away, the pork mentioned in the initial quote: the idea that if a person will actually listen to You, that person is embracing things New Age and evil. So what am I to do? Line item veto. But what do I say to those leaders who refuse to use such a tool? For their sake, I finish out that chapter from Mark:
Mar 8:34
And when he had called the people [unto him] with his disciples also, he said unto them, Whosoever will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me.
Mar 8:35
For whosoever will save his life shall lose it; but whosoever shall lose his life for my sake and the gospel's, the same shall save it.
Mar 8:36
For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?
Mar 8:37
Or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul?
Mar 8:38
Whosoever therefore shall be ashamed of me and of my words in this adulterous and sinful generation; of him also shall the Son of man be ashamed, when he cometh in the glory of his Father with the holy angels.
Will I be ashamed of Thee? No, I embrace Your testimony of Yourself to me.
I remember the words of Joshua...all the words of Joshua, not just the last part, easily thrown up in sanctimonious cross-stitching on people's comfy living room walls, but the whole passage. And I pray to humbly walk with Thee in all of it:
Jos 24:15
And if it seem evil unto you to serve the LORD, choose you this day whom ye will serve; whether the gods which your fathers served that [were] on the other side of the flood, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land ye dwell: but as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.
Amen.
I spent a lot of time recently looking at the claims of one website which denounced Eldredge, Miller, Bell, McLaren, and many others. While some of the claims against some authors, notably Tony Campolo, had some merit, many other claims were based on a very spurious point. It went something like this: Eldredge and others teach you to get alone and listen for God's speaking. Since the bible says we are to pray verbally, any advice to listen to God is New Age, and an open door to the enemy. Pretty ridiculous reasoning.
I wondered as I went to bed last night--are things, even down to the closest relationships in my life a lie, or are You the liar? It felt like this matter HAD to be decided as an either/or. This is the thrust of those who would erect a cross here. All or nothing. To say anything else is to be a heretic and in danger of hell-fire. And by the way, decide NOW! And behind it all, it seems that I'm actually facing that old Groucho Marx question: Who ya gonna believe, me or your lyin' eyes?" Only now, You're asking the question. Do I reject everything that has come to mean "relational interaction" between Thee and me as a thing evil? Do I return to a faith-on-paper life and cast in the fires of judgment all that You seem to say that is of a personal and guiding and loving nature--even those things I find confirmed in Your Word? I ask, because to throw away every text that has been black-listed by those You've placed in leadership over me throws this away, too.
Last night, in bed before I slept, I came through the crisis of whether my debate was all within my own heart; whether it ended there. Was I just a reactionary, mildly delusional woman who just needed and got a good dose of reality? Many would say yes. But even last night, I committed my will to the reality of Your presence in my life...Your real, Holy Spirit presence. And before I slept, I remembered two things You'd told me recently:
1) All has not yet been revealed...
2)The altar is accepted...
If an offering I am to make--and this You've shown me in that domain of Your Spirit where we commune--then there must be an altar. I am exploring every grain of wood upon it, O Ezekiel.
Now this morning, I go into Your word and find You confirm my faith pledge of my will to Thee. I read in Mark 6 and 8 the stories of the feeding of the 5000 and the 4000. After the feeding of the 5000, You went walking on the water before Your disciples, and they thought You a ghost and were terrified, and this after they'd almost let You walk right past them. Why? Their hearts were too hard to remember the miracle of the loaves.
Mar 6:46
And when he had sent them away, he departed into a mountain to pray.
Mar 6:47
And when even was come, the ship was in the midst of the sea, and he alone on the land.
Mar 6:48
And he saw them toiling in rowing; for the wind was contrary unto them: and about the fourth watch of the night he cometh unto them, walking upon the sea, and would have passed by them.
Mar 6:49
But when they saw him walking upon the sea, they supposed it had been a spirit, and cried out:
Mar 6:50
For they all saw him, and were troubled. And immediately he talked with them, and saith unto them, Be of good cheer: it is I; be not afraid.
Mar 6:51
And he went up unto them into the ship; and the wind ceased: and they were sore amazed in themselves beyond measure, and wondered.
Mar 6:52
For they considered not [the miracle] of the loaves: for their heart was hardened.
So later when You fed the 4000, and then You proceeded to be straight away asked yet again for a sign by the Pharisees, You sighed Your deepest of sighs over their demand, because You were "seeing" more than just what was before Your eyes...You were seeing the end of the age. And when You therefore told Your disciples to beware the leaven of the Pharisees and of Herod, here again they had the chance to get the point, but they didn't. They took Your words to be about whether they remembered bread for this boat trip that followed this feeding. They made the here and now simply that, and made Your instruction about their immediate existence and took it in the vein of condemnation. And You said:
Mar 8:17
And when Jesus knew [it], he saith unto them, Why reason ye, because ye have no bread? perceive ye not yet, neither understand? have ye your heart yet hardened?
Mar 8:18
Having eyes, see ye not? and having ears, hear ye not? and do ye not remember?
Mar 8:19
When I brake the five loaves among five thousand, how many baskets full of fragments took ye up? They say unto him, Twelve.
Mar 8:20
And when the seven among four thousand, how many baskets full of fragments took ye up? And they said, Seven.
Mar 8:21
And he said unto them, How is it that ye do not understand?
You taught them to look to the larger meaning of the events of the story of life that played before them and involved them, but was nevertheless a story bigger than they were. Consider things like the number of loaves, You said. And this is the same sort of thing You say to me.
Then You proceeded to heal a man in two stages, one who had obviously been able to see at one time for he know even in that half-way point inhis healing what a tree and what a man should look like. Did they understand why such a healing should "go there" in this Gospel telling?
And then, even Peter had to hear this from Jesus after Jesus had looked at all of them:
Get thee behind me, Satan: for thou savourest not the things that be of God, but the things that be of men. (8:33) Who hears that today? Even Peter?
So here was the question for me, as well. Would I walk with the Word in my hand, but continue to look at the events of life by limited vision? Or would I allow You to interpret them for me, in Your beautiful way? O God, may I never reason within myself condemnation over my lack of "real" bread when You are trying to give me hidden manna! I see now the machinations of Satan in these things that have tried my faith. It is like a bill before congress. To reject the bill is a wise thing, as much in the bill may indeed deny Your virgin birth, heaven, hell, etc. But, pork has been added to this bill...pork that should not be thrown away, the pork mentioned in the initial quote: the idea that if a person will actually listen to You, that person is embracing things New Age and evil. So what am I to do? Line item veto. But what do I say to those leaders who refuse to use such a tool? For their sake, I finish out that chapter from Mark:
Mar 8:34
And when he had called the people [unto him] with his disciples also, he said unto them, Whosoever will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me.
Mar 8:35
For whosoever will save his life shall lose it; but whosoever shall lose his life for my sake and the gospel's, the same shall save it.
Mar 8:36
For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?
Mar 8:37
Or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul?
Mar 8:38
Whosoever therefore shall be ashamed of me and of my words in this adulterous and sinful generation; of him also shall the Son of man be ashamed, when he cometh in the glory of his Father with the holy angels.
Will I be ashamed of Thee? No, I embrace Your testimony of Yourself to me.
I remember the words of Joshua...all the words of Joshua, not just the last part, easily thrown up in sanctimonious cross-stitching on people's comfy living room walls, but the whole passage. And I pray to humbly walk with Thee in all of it:
Jos 24:15
And if it seem evil unto you to serve the LORD, choose you this day whom ye will serve; whether the gods which your fathers served that [were] on the other side of the flood, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land ye dwell: but as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.
Amen.
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